"Who did Jesus die for?" may seem like a simple question but the answer has profound consequences in youth ministry (and ministry in general). Most Wesleyan's answer the question by saying "everyone" which is most appropriate. Unfortunately, many churches conceive and function in youth ministry as if Jesus only died for those youth whose parents come to church or who are members. The youth ministry rarely reaches out to young people in the community, particularly those young people who may need Jesus the most; young people struggling to find meaning, purpose and a reason for their existence. Many of our congregational youth ministries have a built in cultural bias in the form of ministry to white, upper middle class, youth who get along well in the wider culture.

One of the most common complaints from adult workers with youth who actually do try and reach out to youth who are different than the youth who come to church is that parents get upset that they did not want those kind of youth in their church. After all "one bad apple spoils the bunch" and parents don't want their "nice" son or daughter "ruined" by these culturally different teenagers. Nonetheless Jesus died for all both the teen "on the edge" as well as the teen whose parents are church members.

Our youth ministry needs to be focused on all the teens of any community and not just the "nice" church youth. John Wesley did say the world (not the church) is our parish. But this is a difficult task for those of us in youth ministry, particularly when it is the church that pays our salary. At times we may find ourselves needing to run parallel ministries, one to the church youth and one to the youth of the community, if the program is to address the needs of each particular youth sub culture. Pete Ward, in his book, God at the Mall, suggests that most American churches do youth ministry from the inside out (from inside the church to the outside community) BUT that some of us need to do youth ministry from the outside in.

I was reminded of this when I got a call last month from a minister colleague in Memphis. It seems a tattooed, spike and various colored haired, multiple pierced teenager young lady (Jamie) who was never at home in youth group and was not accepted by those youth who came to youth group, killed herself. The tragedy was that this young lady dragged herself to the 8:30am worship service, without her parents (one of whom was in jail), week after week, but because she did not come to youth group, and since her parents were not members she was ignored by the church's youth ministry. The young lady reached out to the church to help her deal with life and her personal demons and the Church said sorry, you don't fit. No adult from the church reached out to her. No one said Jesus died for you and so I will be the "theotokos" (the God bearer) in your life.

Would it have made a difference in the life of Jamie, maybe not. But this I do know that to many of us function in ministry as if God came only to those already in church AND not as if God came to everyone. May we all be the theotokos (The God bearers) to this hurting world.